Balance of Emotions

Thursday Evening, May 15, 2014….cloudy, windy and a storm's a coming!!!!

Today I had a beautiful experience with a Patient.  It's a young man, in his 20s who was born with a terrible disability and can not communicate with words.  He does, however let you know what he's  interested in by facial expressions and hand gestures.  He has recently been placed in Hospice Care.

The first time I played my harp for him about halfway through my playing he motioned for me to turn on his TV….he was done with me.  The next time I just turned down the TV instead of turning it off and that seemed ok, but he kept turning his head away from me, clearly he did not like having me there.

Over these last several weeks, I have not approached him in his room.  He is sometimes out at the Nurses Station and I will just stop and talk to him and make no mention of music or my harp.  I have felt a sense of trust by doing this and today I entered his room and asked if he wanted me to play my Harp.  He just stared at me, no expression.  Then he slowly lifted his hand and made a motion to turn off the TV with his remote…..which I couldn't find anywhere.  After asking the Nurse for help, he was given his remote and he turned off his TV.

I decided to tell him the names of the Tunes before I played them.  I did a couple of things and then I asked if he liked Bob Dylan….he moved his eyes..that was a yes.  I played Blowin in the Wind and sang the chorus while I played.  I glanced at him and he had a tear on his cheek.  Ok….I almost lost it at that moment.  I did some Beatles, "In My Life" and I did "Sound of Silence".  I finished up with "I will Always Love You" and when I was done I looked at him and told him the name of the song and that I would always love him, my friend.  Another tear but this time I could not hold it back.  I just let it happen and told him I would be back to play for him again soon.

This was incredibly sad today, but at the same time I feel I made a friend and he had loved having music today.  So hard to balance my emotions.